Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Means To An End...

I have never been one to enjoy the spotlight...having everyone love me and want to be me is not my idea of a good life. I don't like it when people try to copy me or try to be like me...I can't even remotely understand why a person would not want to just be themselves?

I even get a ting of horror when I have to go get a Steeplechase or Grand Prix award...yeah I am sure many don't get that--but I do...why I LOVED college...I was #714823 or something like that...a NUMBER. Not in the spotlight...not even having a name...loved it :)

That is not to say I am not a social person...I am very social...to those close to me and people I know well. If I don't talk to you it isn't because I don't LIKE you...but we just haven't really met or talked much. Those that know me will tell you I never shut the heck up :) I assure you on that!



So when I see a person that wants to be in that spotlight SO bad they are willing to do about anything--get another dog that will get them there, ruin several dogs with bad training and bad attitude on their part,etc etc etc. I have a REALLY hard time putting my mind around it.

I had a situation just recently where I realized I was basically a "means to an end" for a person. I guess I always KNEW I was...but I refused to see the signs that would make me believe it. After all my childhood horrors growing up...I STILL have the thought that people ARE good...so I guess I ignore those things until it becomes so obvious that it is like running into a brick wall.
Made me really feel sorry for dogs that are treated like that. Myself...as a human, can just choose to move onto better things...better people, better relationships. As a dog...they have no choice in the matter...they are just dogs used to get someone to some situation in life...a stepping stone perhaps one would call it, to greatness. THEY KNOW. They HAVE to know. They know your love and affection is just a means to an end...they know it isn't 100% real...or it is completely conditional. What a way to live...
At trials I joke sometimes that I love Klink this day or that...depending on if she Q's :) A JOKE of course...there are not many things in my life I would put above my dogs and Klink is no exception. I ADORE my dogs...all of them.

I pick my dogs off a connection...not off color or markings or structure or toy drive or or or. I pick the puppy I emotionally connect to. (OK so Even looks like her mother...but the connection was that she ACTED like her mother...K? LOL)
So far things have worked out for me...my dogs have the heart to work with me...we have a great connection and they KNOW I love them all to death. Unconditionally. Sure, we will have our disagreements..they will scold me for not doing my job and I will scold them for the same thing...but there are always disagreements in relationships right? :)
When I look at a pup, I don't see a jump height...an outrun...a running a-frame...a perfect shed...I see a pup. I see something I love and adore. A new family member :)
Not sure how to deal with people that think anything other than that...I guess I need to learn to deal with those kinds of people...any ideas would be greatly appreciated...as currently they just really frustrate me...

Now I am not trying to be "Holier than thou"...I am nowhere perfect on my relationships with my dogs...I am always working on strengthening my bond with my dogs and working on myself as well :-)) I have lots to work on all the time...but I AM working...

There is nothing more amazing than watching a person that REALLY loves their dogs. There is a gal that trials with her Labs...and the ADORATION she has for her dogs is just amazing...you can tell she loves those dogs and doesn't care what happens...if they never run agility again..she doesn't care. Her love for her dog SHINES through with everything she does...amazing :)

6 comments:

Emma Rose said...

We believe if a person can't LOVE their dogs unconditionally then they shouldn't have dogs. How can anyone look a dog in the eye and say "It's just a dog"? There is a genuine gifted spirit behind those eyes. They don't know what they are missing, or they just don't care. It saddens me.

An English Shepherd said...

You are correct. Dogs are Dogs and people who behave like that do not deserve to have any.

Wizz :-)

Dianna said...

I agree, there is NOTHING sadder than a owner who stomps out of the ring (I've seen it especially in the upper levels of obedience, but it happens everywhere) angry with their dog, stuffing it in the crate and then complaining the rest of the day about the "stupid dog". Very sad, since more than likely it was their lack of training/proofing/whatever, that caused the problem, not the dogs. These type of people must have the ribbons, but most of all the perceived "fame", to have beaten who they feel is "the best". Dogs don't care about fame, they just want to have fun. If they never got to do agility/herding/flyball/obed. again, they'd be happy to just lay by your side. Great post.

BCxFour said...

You wrote: "As a dog...they have no choice in the matter...they are just dogs used to get someone to some situation in life...a stepping stone perhaps one would call it, to greatness. THEY KNOW. They HAVE to know. They know your love and affection is just a means to an end...they know it isn't 100% real...or it is completely conditional. What a way to live..."

Amen, Amen, Amen...

The longer I am in the herding world, the more I am seeing this and it makes me sick. The dogs are tools - and extension of their own ego. To be sold, upgraded and passed off to further their objectives - to win.

Our dogs are family members - I wouldn't get rid of one simply because they don't do what I want them to. Any more than I would sell one of my children because they did something stupid (tempting but ...well you know). No one would buy my teenagers anyway.

Monique said...

Friend first, workmates because we are friends. As it should be between man and his dog...

Sadly your post is incredibly astute. Particularly in the sheepdog world it seems a such, though it exists in every venue.

And yes, people treat other people in an equally disrespectful way. You are correct, the dog does not have any choice in the matter. I have no doubt my dogs would go to the ends of the earth, or even to their deaths, simply because I asked it. I like to think it is because we love and respect one another, but I always must remind myself, my dog has no choice in who her owner is. I must choose to be an owner worthy of such an honorable beast.

TorBlade Canines said...

Well said...and totally agree with picking a pup by having a connection with them...when you know you know:)