Pet Peeves

It's rainy...yuck. And I'm waiting on the electrician to come...which come be anywhere from 8 to NOON...so I'm cranky...so a cranky post it is...LMAO!

When you work with other people, eventually there are a certain number of human behaviors that come up that you must deal with or tolerate. I am VERY lucky that I don't have these issues anymore as I pick who I take in for lessons (very grateful for that!). But I got some good ones when I taught classes A LOT.

People have to learn, and I will normally call someone on this (not like HEY YOU JACKA$$ or anything) but I try to change their behavior.

I am almost 100% certain my students could add to this list, as I am sure there are things I have gotten onto them about before that I have forgotten. And please, feel free to add to this list as well! LOL Here's a short list of pet peeves I have when training others.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE teaching...but sometimes I would like something soft and cushy to throw at people...sometimes if that soft and cushy thing was like, for example, a cement block, that would ALSO be useful :)

These are in no particular order :)

Talking to dogs in amazingly compound sentences. Instead of just saying "Rover, COME!"...they have a dissertation "Hello Rover, won't you please come over here and sit next to me so we can run agility and I can give you these treats". All Rover hears is "LALALALALALALALALALALALALA Rover, LALALALALALALALALALALALALALA agility LALALALALALALALALA treats. Dogs don't speak English. I can GUARANTEE YOU THIS. Use words the dog knows.

When people use the word "down" to mean lie down and also when the dog is supposed to get off of them (aka jumping up)...use OFF. Or French Fries, or whatever. But they don't mean the same, so use a different word. MANY people do it...but it bugs me...

People who drive all the way out to my place (and you gotta wanna come out here) and spend their lesson time NOT trying things that I ask them to do. I'm not asking for a kidney or your first born...a front cross here, or there? TRY IT. JUST TRY. If you "no likey", I'm fine, but you drove a LONG way to get here and you won't get much out of it if you don't TRY.

People who, after going to a seminar (which I encourage my students to do) come back and want to change EVERYTHING about their handling, training etc. Yeah...M-Kay.

People who come to class in a really bad mood, treat their dog like crapola and wonder why things are not going as planned. LET IT GO when you pull into my driveway please.

When a person makes a mistake and DOESN'T REWARD THEIR DOG...I get my students broke of this SUPER QUICKLY :) I am sure they will agree.

Telling me that your dog is a "insert breed here" and they will chase things, attack my sheep, run off, kill critters etc etc etc. Not while they are here they won't. That's why we TRAIN them :) 6 BC's, no dogs harassing sheep, or chasing cars...JRT, calls off prey. Training :) Let's focus on that.

Not bringing treats or toys or whatever else motivates your dog, to your lesson...huh? You think you're THAT amazing to keep your dog interested for a solid hour with no payment? You're not.

"My dog has a recall sometimes"...it's like being pregnant...you either are, or you are not. Don't tell me that and then take off the leash so your dog can go rampant pissing on all my agility equipment while you attempt to catch them.

Don't let your dog piss on my agility equipment...or I'll piss in your training bag...K Thanks!

If your children are WELL BEHAVED, they are fine to come to lessons. If you're children are NOT WELL BEHAVED, then please....get a babysitter. I don't hate kids, some kids I really REALLY like...but there are some children that I do believe came from the deep bowels of hell....Children must have good recalls, have a sit stay, a NO BARK command and if you have some chew bones to keep them busy that is great as well (video games are great for this). If you spend the entire hour yelling at your kids for being kids and bored...you won't get much out of your lesson. However it WILL give me great insight into why your dog is trained the way it is :)

I don't live in the land of excuses, I live in the land of fixing issues and training...excuses do nothing but hold you and your dog back. If you didn't train this week, just fess up and I won't try to increase the difficulty of the skills you are learning. I won't get angry, I won't beat you with sharp objects. The restraining order took care of that YEARS ago ;-)

When, trying a different method (as nothing else has worked)...will try it for....a day, or two days...deem it not working because the dog hasn't even figured out what the hell they are doing changing the rules and try something different...CONSTANTLY changing their approach to the issue or task they want trained. Do you think that MIGHT confuse the dog a "weeeee bit?"

I cannot control the weather...if it's thundering and lightening, putting your dog on METAL agility equipment is not a smart move. Please, don't get mad at me if we have to stop during class...I have your dogs best interest in mind...if I could control the weather, Minnesota winters would be GONE. I can guarantee you that!!! So yeah. Sorry...shit happens :)

You will NOT get those contacts retrained a day before the trial...or the WP entries, or fix jumping issues....if it ain't trained yet, it won't get trained the day before. I know this...I really do.

Don't force dogs to do something...tunnels are a HUGE example...when teaching tunnels to dogs, for some reason many humans believe if you SHOVE THE DOG INTO THE TUNNEL, that will be a GREAT and positive experience for the dog. It isn't. Most dogs find that really off-putting. And honestly...if someone tried to force me to do something, they'd probably get bit. Or kicked in the junk...or both. Let the DOG DECIDE...if you have the reward they want, then it will work out!

Bringing ONE--7 pound Milk Bone dog biscuit to class...how the HELL are you going to reward the 17,000 times in an hour your dog does something amazing? And if you CAN carve a piece off that giant corn/soybean meal log...you're gonna be too late to reward what you wanted to reward anyway!

Border Collies do NOT come trained. They are very smart...to me almost like an autistic savant...so think "Rain Man"...you can really make them into amazing dogs, or you can end up with a complete moron of an animal, drooling, staring at light beams all day, repeating "Gotta Watch Watpner" over and over and over again. Not joking on this.

Showing up with a "POWER DOG" aka Staffy, Pitbull, GSD, etc etc. and talking about how the world hates your breed of dog, and then in the same breath how your dog will KILL ANYTHING...and you have to have the prong collar on them at ALL TIMES cause they might KILL SOMETHING. Lets try to be a good example of ownership OK? If you want something POWERFUL...get an automobile. Or better yet, some self esteem :-)) Whaaaaaa? I didn't say that, you didn't read that...nope. Nope...

Feel free to add to the list :) I'm sure there are a TON MORE...and I'm not gonna say I have never done most of these...so no judgement here! Just stating the facts! :)

Damn electrician STILL isn't here....Grrrrrrrrrr

Now we will return back to the scheduled program or RAINBOWS AND UNICORNS!!! :) Happiness!!! YAY!!!!!! Clapping :)

PS--I have found something more scary than clowns----Gary Bucey---SHUDDER