Monday, November 29, 2010

It's The Most Wonderful Time, Of The Year!

It's that time of the year again :) Time to turn the house into a seizure inducing, barrage of twinkling lights and red and green glitter! YIPPEE!

Putting up 7 million stockings...or eleven... And the tree, which for some reason my dogs line up in front of it when I go to take the picture, NO I did not put them there, they just run to the tree and sit when I get the camera out and start going towards it...they are all camera whores...

We also have to start being on "ornament alert"...certain ones are very popular to pluck off the tree and we have to be there to make sure they are not abducted...some of the favorites that must be placed higher on the tree: BUT IT'S A SHEEP! AND WE ARE SHEEPDOGS!!! Whatever...LEAVE IT!
No idea why the giraffe (yes the tag is still on...a private joke)...but they want it, and they take it...so it must be elevated.
And this one...WTF? Don't get it...but it is SUPER easy to see who has this, the red glitter all over their greedy little chops tells it all. EVEN...

Last year several people wanted to actually SEE the stockings I made for the dogs...so here ya go! Crackers was little, white and pink as a puppy...hence the "piglet" term on his stocking...and his litter name was "Pop" :) As in "snap, crackle and pop"...
Even Steven's of course :) Steven being her nickname and her OCD problem with tennis balls...worse than any dog I have ever owned (and lets not forget we have 6 BC's and a JRT)...seriously...medication level :)
Lynn...Lulu is one of her many nicknames (although currently it could be replaced with the nickname "Damnit Lynn! STOP BITING GATOR ON THE NECK!!!"...but that might be a bit long for the stocking :( Snow...because she runs full speed into snow drifts, and BARK, because her mouth is FREAKIN' HUGE AND LOUD...
Klink--Stinky Pete...the nickname she has had since she was 8 weeks old. No idea how she got it...maybe she was a gassy puppy?
Zip--Zippity Zoom--another nickname...and a sheep, pretty self explanatory there :)
Ace--the original stocking...I apparently wasn't feeling overly creative 11 years ago :) I would have been 20...I was probably drinking at the time...oops, never mind, I would have been "under age"...so for all you kiddies out there, that is BAAADD...I would NEVER do that...wink wink ;-)
Ugh...and yes, Andy made me make Vittles one...and he said I couldn't put PITA (Pain In The ASS) on the stocking...so it has all sorts of things that really don't describe her....PITA would have been perfect..and maybe destroyer of soft things, JRT ass kicker...but NO...Andy is so annoying sometimes. Harley is the rabbit...who is really old, but we are happy we still have him :)
Gator--Tater Salad--best nickname ever (thanks Ron White!)...
And the human stockings :) Andy's is back from the St. Louis Blues and Al :) Mine is blank as I tend to cuss a lot and dad always said "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all"...so there...nuttin' :)

A new thing this year is Even is OUT...yep, out in the house. And she is VERY EXCITED about the Christmas tree!!!!! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! We...are not nearly as excited as she is...and neither are the rest of the dogs...PRETTY...PRETTY...SHINY...SPARKLY!!!!!
OMG this is like the most awesome thing I have ever seen...MORE SHINY! MORE SHINY!
Glitter.is.AmAzING...
DID YOU SEE THAT LIGHT BLINK!!?!?!? HOLY SHIT!!!!! DID YOU SEE IT!?!?!
S-H-I-N-Y G-L-I-T-T-E-R-Y G-O-O-D-N-E-S-S

We are limiting her tree time...it's best that way...really...for all of us...

She even has Gator convinced his "friends" are in there somewhere...

We also tried to put up a little city scene this year...so excited to put all the little houses up, the little people, horses, etc etc...and I think I have scarred all the village people for life (not to be confused with the Y-M-C-A village people). Apparently the village was attacked sometime last night by a gigantic RABID sheep...it was so very terrifying... Is that not the scariest thing you have EVER SEEN!?!?! Seriously, that thing is as big as a HOUSE!
Mr and Mrs Whothehellknows and their dog look absolutely terrified. Maybe they have a little shrink dude and office for counseling in the box that the rest of the village crap came in...I probably just forgot to unpack it...otherwise, anyone know where I can get one?

I need to find the perpetrator, that will help the village people get over this...was it LYNN? Who Me? Naw....I was sleeping on the couch...

Or Even? No way, I was too busy watching SHINY THINGS on the tree...

I am never going to know...there were no prints or hairs left at the scene of the crime...maybe I need to get one of those motion activated cameras...

Also during this time, we like to get out little gifts that have been given to us over the years, special gifts that give us fond memories of friends and family :)

Like this pillow... Sure, you might be asking why there are holes in it...and it is all frayed up...
And why it looks like a corner has been chewed off the one end...
I have no idea...honestly.
But it is very special to us...and apparently to Zip as well...

And of course, since it is winter, we have to keep ourselves entertained with the long months inside...by playing dress up with the little dog...hee...hee...hee In really ugly and embarrassing doggie clothing from Walmart!! YAY! Kill me...please...put me out of my misery...now, I beg of you.
You better not put this damn picture on your dumbass blog...

On another note...not related to any of this other stuff...someone asked me how the sock monkey was holding up...

Quite well! We are on several days and I have to say, the Walmart sock monkey ROCKS!It is currently the favorite toy of the dogs...they pass it around like a bong, taking hits off of it all day...great time spender...best $2 I have ever spent...

We do however, have a small injury... Someone gnawed his tail off, but I guess in the big scheme of things, his head and all appendages are still intact...which is really a miracle if you consider the dogs do THIS to him daily: Toys in our house are sentenced to their deaths...I sort of feel sorry for them when we buy them...thinking of them going all Toy Story on me at night...but what is a girl to do? Lynn is by far the worst...just something about how she treats her toys is very scary to me...as if she is a budding serial killer...

NO MOM, I am just HUGGING the cow toy, see?? I am NOT trying to strangle the life out of him, twisting his neck and breaking his legs...NOOOOOO

I'm watching you Lynn...

This year was a new thing for us...Ace doesn't care for his picture being taken, there is no mystery at all in this. He will run away...hide, look pitiful, but we have always been able to get him to look a bit less than "completely petrified with fear"...and this year, I guess after 11 years of pictures...he decided there was no way he would cooperate. So we gave up...I hope he will change his mind next year, but he did nothing but turn away from the camera and roll over on his back...I didn't want him to pee or anything, not sure that he would, but if he did I would have to clean up stuff, and I am lazy like that...so we let him off...It seems weird having the photo without him...I am hoping next year we can get him in there :) Until then...HAPPY HOLIDAYS from the Full Tilt Crew!

9 comments:

D said...

LMAO...poor Crackers! I'm a bit jealous though...maybe I should dress up my cats! (That would go over really well, I'm sure) They don't make outfits that cute for the big dogs. :) Those pics of Even staring at the "red ball" are the best!

Marcella Ward said...

Love it! The stockings are awesome. So unique and each have their own special meaning. Love how the bunny has one too. Our guinea pig did. :) Happy Holidays from Shimmy and me to you and your gang!!!

KPR said...

You. Were. Right.

Sare said...

Lynn - killer of toys huh? Perhaps she has been watching too much Dexter!

You are a brave soul hanging blinking, shiny, glittery things, Even or no Even. She will be fun this Christmas - and the best gift you got this year I'll bet!

livin life said...

I love Even..not that I don't love all your dogs...but Even is just a serious kindred spirit. Now I must go to Walmart and get my sock monkeys...and then put up my Christmas tree to see what Gyp might think. I'll be back....

Loretta Mueller said...

LOL Lora! You go do that! :) I hope to make some people throw up a little with this post :) Probably many herding purists :) LOL

Dianna--I think you should dress the cats up!! TAKE PICTURES!

Marcella--Thanks!!!!

Sarah--yes...it will be just another training thing :)

Loretta Mueller said...

SWEET! KPR is the first barfer :) YES!!!!

Loretta Mueller said...

Oh..and yes Lora...it is hard to not like Even...she just has something about her...not sure what it is...but it's there :) I hope you get to meet her someday!

Karissa said...

For some reason you didn't strike me as the "holly jolly" type -- But I sure am glad you are, because this post (and the accompanying pictures) is awesome. You almost have inspired me to decorate. Almost, but not quite.